An Emotional Primer for Men

Chapter 1: The Yin Side

There is evidence to suggest that the entire planet is experiencing acceleration into a more emotionally aware state of consciousness. Difficult as it is to admit, it appears that women have a definite edge in making this transition. This is not to say that we are learning to be irrational, or for that matter that the emotional strength with which women seem to be endowed is necessarily irrational. This awareness is, however, not rational. I am speaking of a growing sensitivity to a less physical energy which permeates this dimension of reality. Our emotional senses are every bit as real as our physical senses. In many ways, they can tell us more about our lives than where we are in space and time or how safe our environment is (the purview of our physical senses). Being open to emotional energy increases our awareness of those around us. These senses detect life force in its ebb and flow and make connections to people and things outside ourselves. Our physical senses best show our separateness from the rest of creation. Feeling connected to the world around us is the root of happiness for most of us. Neither mind nor body can provide this source of joy for us.

As an essentially feminine form of awareness, emotion is receptive, drawing energy inwards. It moves through us in waves, developing gradually, reaching crescendo and subsiding as slowly as it comes upon us. With practice, this movement can be distinctly felt. We must plan not to stand before these waves to be battered by them. Neither should we try to surf them, skimming their surface only. We must learn to allow the waves of energy to wash over us and pass on their way. We can trust that there is a message in each wave which we need to hear. Opening ourselves to this motion brings clarity to these messages. The willingness to listen and be receptive to the quiet voice beneath the turmoil is key to success in becoming more fully human.

To deal with such feminine energy, we practice acceptance and trust and flexibility. As these are feminine traits, we men may need to practice a lot before they seem comfortable or natural to us. Like any other repair program, such as for house, car or small appliances, repairing the damage we’ve done to our emotional bodies with a life of repression will get easier as we learn the skills. We will get into more complex matters as we go along and utilize these skills with greater confidence.

This work uses a great deal of our body’s energies. We are using much more of our nervous and endocrine systems to explore feeling states than we are accustomed to using. It will be no surprise to find ourselves fatigued or distracted or less interested in activities that once were the norm for us. This is a time for feminine remedies like rest, patience and gentleness. We need to seek the support of those who care for us. As the urge to express our feelings mounts, the support of others becomes even more important. This work makes us more genuine and honest and self revealing with others and this support will be easier to come by as a result. Now, this is not a traditional guy thing for sure! Most of us think we have to earn (or take) the love we get. We compete for it and then wonder why we don’t feel like winners for long. The working world is a convenient place to hide because it is more consistent and linear than relationships. Applying these Yin remedies to our jumbled feelings, self love, gentleness and support, we find there is more love out there for us than we had been willing to allow.

Loving, nurturing, supporting, accepting, non-resistance...Yep! Chick things!

It is about time we learned how.

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