An Emotional Primer for Men
Chapter 4: Where the heart
Where there is no resistance there is no harm.
This is the fundamental principle of healing in all portions of the
human energy gestalt. It is resistance (repression, suppression, displacement,
projection and so on) which creates all the myriad dis-eases which plague
our lives. There is a basic distrust in the benevolent nature of life itself
which spurs and fosters this resistance. By not trusting the integrity
of our being, we actively plot our own destruction. Doesn't that sound
So, why should we trust that the universe is unfolding as it should?
How do we use that trust to heal ourselves? Ooooops! We might do well to
take one large question at a time.
Perhaps a peek at the nature of how the "stuff" of creation
interacts with itself will clear up a question or two. Though primordial
"creative force" is as infinitely beyond energy in its subtlety
as energy is beyond matter, its interactions with itself follow the same
universal principles. Reflections of these principles (Laws?) are seen
everywhere. I guess that is why they are called Universal. (Well DUH!)
One such law states that LIKE ATTRACTS LIKE. This puts the principle of
resonance into personal terms. Whether a simple energy construct like a
photon or a wildly complex spiritual being made manifest, only energies
which resonate (vibrate at similar frequency and amplitude) can be perceived
and interacted with. Otherwise, dissimilar energies are repelled at the
fringes of the field (or standing wave) that make up the structure of each
The tuning fork demonstration is a most effective illustration of this
principle in action. When dissimilar frequencies are struck simultaneously,
both stand alone and distinct. There is no interaction (except within a
perceiver who can resonate to both tones). The tones are perceived as distinct
and separate even then. When a harmonious pair of sounds is struck, there
is a blending taking place both in the perceived sound and in the waves
of the sounds themselves. The sound blends into an integrated whole. In
fact, one tone can activate the second (of the proper resonance) without
the second needing to be struck.
Obviously, in so complex a being as human, the waters get a bit muddy
at times. It is rarely so straightforward in the application of this principle.
Given enough experiences of synchronicity, we can eventually come to a
recognition of this principle in action. The overall implication is that
nothing enters our perception to which we do not resonate. There must be
an answering chord struck inside us for the event to be perceived. It is
virtually not possible otherwise. We create our energy structure, with
which we identify, moment by moment through the projection of our beliefs
onto the energetic matrix of creation. This structure is then reflected
back to us by all of the experience, inner and outer, to which it resonates.
Of course, our beliefs are very complex, convoluted and conflicting. Nonetheless,
our life experience is the direct result of this energetic format we have
cast onto the fabric of life.
What this means, simply, is that we cannot experience life objectively.
All experience is subjective. Even our experience of spiritual reality
is intensely personal and nothing can get through without already being
already a part of our Selves. The converse implies that as the universe
we perceive is our Selves, that as nothing we experience (even death) is
outside our own beings, we can come to no harm in life. Perceiving our
Selves from the perspective of the universe changes everything.
OK! Take a deep breath. Hope you got all that because I can't go through
that again just now. However it gets stated, we own our experience in total.
It is us completely, though we are not limited to it. Our experience of
other people for instance shows us only ourselves reflected. Each moment
perceived is completely colored by our interpretation of that event. People
who do not resonate with us do not show up in our experience. Those who
do show up cannot hurt us because in a very real way, they are us. We will
only perceive who we are. If we expand our identities to include others,
then we may see them more accurately. That supposes a greater degree of
maturity as souls than most us muster on a regular basis, but it is possible.
On a deeply spiritual level, we are very connected, but do we live on that
level? So what, you might ask, about Opposites Attract? I was hoping you'd
ask that! This is a good example of projecting our illusions into principles.
Kind of like casting God into the Big Guy in the Sky. When we encounter
someone or something we do not WANT to identify with, we proclaim its separateness
from us. We brand it NOT ME. We refuse to embrace The Other and do not
accept it as an aspect of ourselves. Its simple presence in our lives proves
that not so but we persist in our delusion. When these encounters become
annoyingly repetitive, we proclaim that Opposites Attract. After all, we
really do want to keep them separate from ourselves. There must be a NOT
ME. And it persists in following me everywhere. Eeeeeck!
The energy we expend keeping such experiences at arm's length is phenomenal.
The harder we push them away from us, the more dearly they seem to cling.
We can run, but we cannot hide from ourselves. It is little wonder that
we are so ill in body, mind and spirit as a species.
If we have practiced any of the first three healing acts already discussed
- allowing our experiences to take place without judgment, being honest
in exploring them, and forgiving ourselves and others for participating
in them - we will have begun to see glimmers of how large we really are
as beings. Eventually we can encompass an infinity. Here in this fourth
principle we have a point of balance between active creation processes
and the passive acceptance of perfection in action. At this point of balance,
acceptance becomes surrender. Honest self reflection also becomes a more
subtle octave, discernment. Both yin and the yang activities achieve a
greater depth and refinement as we near balance. The masculine attribute
of discernment provides the opportunity to connect (feminine) our emotional
experience with its root causes. This brings us deeper into the psyche
to explore our earliest traumas and our inner spiritual awareness. The
steps to follow will carry us into manifesting this growing awareness.
New layers of meaning and consciousness will emerge as we progress through
these steps. We will return to this point of balance many times. The practice
will help us to learn to maintain it as we go through life.
Practicing non-resistance puts us into the flow of the energies to which
we resonate. It is the ultimate choice of free will. Do we go along willingly
with the evolution of the soul or do we go kicking and screaming? There
is no other real choice to be made from moment to moment. The soul evolves;
that is its nature. This practice of acceptance is the identification of
ourselves with our souls. From this vantage point, we literally know we
can do no wrong. No matter what happens, everything turns out right because
the higher being is in ultimate charge anyway. This is a straight out fact
of life in the universe. Frankly, though, how many of us actually live
One of the things we quickly perceive in this heart-open mode is that
the universe ceases to be personal. Unconditional love is thoroughly non-attached.
It is this lack of attachment to our personal selves which catapults us
into awareness. Expanding into a boundless creation, we no longer need
to protect parts of ourselves from other parts of ourselves. Expanding
our identity toward infinity makes all aspects of self more acceptable.
To summarize, all that we CAN perceive "out there" is who
we are. It comes in the form that our beliefs dictate. Embracing this experience
of life into our identities makes us larger beings (in our own minds and
in fact). We come to hold less and less back and become more and more free.
We have long shackled ourselves by believing the universe is such and so.
We have limited it and ourselves to what we can conceive it to be. If we
give ourselves room to expand into the universe, by accepting its perfection
and complete goodness (laying aside our habitual interpretations of good
and evil) and by offering no resistance to the flow of energy through us
(Thy Will Be Done) we can become who we really are; All That Is.
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